In this week of Judging a Game by its Demo, things are going to be done a little different.  The new demos that have been released has made me quite upset.  After looking at “Up” “X Blades” and “Bionic” I am sick to my stomach.  Not only were these games remarkably horrendous, but I also waited almost 3 weeks for a demo to show up. So due to my long anticipated wait for a demo to review and then be presented with a crap filled basket of games I am going to this review slightly obscure compared to the previous reviews.  Instead of breaking down each game with my in-game experience, I am instead going to list the top 5 things I hate about each game because they don’t deserve a full review.  So here it goes:

X Blades:

1. This game is full of horrible dialogue that makes the game seem like it was made by a 3rd grader.

2. An unexplained opening video that leaves you sitting there asking yourself, “What was the point of that?”

3. The aiming mechanic of the game is horrible.  When it comes to multiple characters, you cant easily distinguish your target.

4. The camera control is not intuitive, it will be very difficult to navigate around the horribly designed environment.

5. Just another button mashing titty game.

**Positive: Hot girl with lots of weapons.  Sweet, but not enough to play the game. [2 hot warriors out of 10]

Pixar’s Up

1. The only interesting character, the talking dog, isn’t even in the demo!!

2. Getting through the game is way too easy.

3. Replay value is zero…if you can even make it through this boring demo.

4. Cliche lines every couple minutes that makes the game completely lame.

5. It’s another game made from a movie. Enough said.

**Positive: You can hit your teammate in multiplayer to create an unintentional but funny battle between your friends. [2 over sized helium balloons out of 10]

Bionic multiplayer Demo

1. Overly dark maps that makes it extremely difficult to play.

2. No details in the characters and the only thing distinguishing the different teams is color.

3. Lack of weapons to use.

4. The lack of a good tutorial. You start the game with a band of players that all have no idea what they are doing.

5. The obvious attempt to copy Halo and the epic fail that goes along with it.

**Positive:…There is no positive, don’t play it. [1 halo wannabe out of 10]

So please, for your own good, stay away from these games.  It is just a waste of your time.  Stick to the games that you play now…until next Judging a Game by its Demo.  Hopefully there will be something better than this.

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